Dining in the Dark – Mediocrity amplified

50, Changkat Bukit Bintang, Bukit Bintang, 50200, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

We went to Dining in the Dark recently for a very belated Valentine’s Day dinner and I must say it was a pretty disappointing experience.

As I understand it, the idea is to deprive you of visual input so your tastebuds are not influenced by what you see. Your sense of taste is sharpened and you experience your food more intensely. If we follow that logic, then this will only be a good experience if the food is great in the first place, right?

Sadly, much as their website boasts about ‘surprise menus’ that take diners on a ‘marvelous gastronomic journey’ the food is no more than mediocre.

And, I'm guessing, they're not too big on food presentation either.

What they did deliver on – in spades – was the ‘total darkness’ bit. We couldn’t see anything other than the red dots of light on the security cameras – presumably installed to capture footage of clumsy diners for a ‘funniest videos’ show… or to catch kleptomaniac guests emboldened by the cover of darkness.

We weren't allowed to bring phones or anything else that glows into the dining area. This 'picture' of the security camera is an artist's impression.

And in the pitch-black, not able to see my food, tasting something not-so-great makes my mind conjure up some pretty disturbing stuff. For example, the pasta was cold and the room-temperature, watery sauce made me think I was eating someone else’s leftovers. One of the soups tasted like it came out of a can. One of the dessert items tasted like it was cheap chocolate ice-cream that came out of a cardboard box sold off a pushcart. As the darkness enhanced our sense of taste, the mediocre food only tasted even more intensely mediocre.

That’s not all – our sense of hearing got enhanced too, with equally undesirable results. The couple sitting two tables away sounded like they were having their intimate conversation with us instead of each other.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, eating was hugely uncomfortable too. We had to grope about in the dark to find our plates. Then we are encouraged to use our fingers to push the food onto our spoons to avoid scooping up thin air. If this is a ‘fine dining’ experience like they touted on their website, they could have served bite-sized servings of food on individual spoons. Then we would get the right proportions of everything in every bite. But no – they made us use our hands, clumsily shoveling haphazard spoonfuls into our mouths like we were starving refugees.

Finally, perhaps what irritated me most of all about this whole crappy experience was the preachy talk at the end of the meal reminding us how clumsy we were when we couldn’t see what we were doing. Well DUH!

You may think I’m sounding whiney but you have to consider that they did promise an incredible dining experience filled with fresh sensory delights. I was expecting to eat well. But instead, they focused so much on the darkness part of the experience that the food tasted like an afterthought tacked on at the last second.

It’s a shame, really – an interesting concept that was poorly executed. But, much as I dislike it, I guess there will still be people who are interested to go dine in the dark for the experience, so I won’t go into any more detail about the food to avoid spoiling the mystery. Just remember to lower your expectations of the food and you may have a better experience than I did.

Bite-sized review

Eat in pitch darkness. Interesting concept but executed poorly – focused too much on the darkness gimmick and not enough on the food. The result is mediocre food that tastes more intensely mediocre in the darkness.

Stats

Price: RM118++ per person for a 3-course ‘fine dining’ menu that isn’t very fine at all

Hours: 6:00pm to 9:30pm – Tuesdays to Sundays

Reservations: Required – no walk-ins allowed

Marini’s on 57 – Fulamak, damn 7 atas

Level 57, Menara 3 Petronas, Persiaran KLCC, 50088, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Lady Fartsalot took me to this super high-end Italian place for my birthday this year, and I must say everything is exceedingly atas about this place: its altitude above sea level, the standard of service, and prices so stratospheric they’ll give you a nosebleed… and then probably a coronary for good measure.

The feeling that I am entering a totally unfamiliar world began when we arrived at the ground floor of Petronas Tower 3.

I didn’t even know the Twin Towers had a runt of a little brother.
(Image stolen from wgc2012.com)

There were two people at the ground floor reception to greet us. Then a few more to point us toward the lift – which had a ceiling higher than the ones in most homes I’ve been to. Yep – even their elevator is more atas than others. Then we arrive on level 57 and a whole TEAM was there just to greet us. I think I counted more than 10 people whose only job seemed to be to stand around in suits looking smart and saying hello and goodbye to customers.

 We had a table by the window, and the view during sunset was really quite spectacular. 

(Image stolen from their website) 

Our server introduced herself and her partner – there would be two of them taking care of us that evening. I was about to tell her that we are very low-maintenance customers and would not require this much attention when the breads arrived. There were about 5 varieties but our favourite were the crispy, wafer-thin ones.

They're the ones in the middle of the basket - crispy and nicely seasoned, they make perfect snacks for movie night.

We ordered based on our server’s recommendations, and were settling down to enjoy the view when suddenly a bonsai-looking plant landed on our table in a pot with two furry-looking green fruits attached. It was explained that this was a complimentary appetiser from the kitchen. The ‘fruits’ were fried kalamata olive snacks coated with parmesan and basil powder. It was nice and crumbly, tasting strongly of olives with a nice touch of parmesan.

I believe this is called an amuse bouche in French cuisine – I certainly found this whimsical presentation highly amusing.

Next, came the starter we ordered to share: two big, juicy scallops, lightly seared and still raw in the middle, resting on a celeriac puree and liberally sprinkled with sea asparagus and black truffle shavings. The scallops were plump, sweet and luxurious – probably my favourite seafood next to uni – and I regret cutting dainty bites instead of just popping the whole thing into my mouth.

This dish also gave me my first real taste of truffles. It’s nice to finally know what all the fuss is about.

Lady Fartsalot’s main was angel hair pasta with Maine lobster tail in tomato sauce. Obviously, everything was perfectly cooked, and the tomato sauce had a rich, smooth, creamy seafood flavour.

We wiped the plate so thoroughly with bread, the dishwasher probably wondered why they brought him a clean plate.

For my main, I ordered cod, cooked 3 ways. I was told I should eat the dish from left to right – so that’s how I’ll describe it.

Well, looking at it from this angle, it's bottom to top.

We begin with strips of cod tripe in a rich, slightly spicy seafood bisque that tasted quite strongly of lobster. The texture was chewy and gelatinous – which may be a bit of a challenge for some but which I happened to like.

Yes, I mopped up the sauce in this one, too.

In the middle, a cod mousse, which was not the pureed cod that I had imagined. Rather, there were pieces of salty cod meat in a buttery, porridge-like substance. Somehow, the term 'grits' came to mind when tasting this - though I don’t believe I’ve ever tasted grits before in my life.

Cod porridge would probably have been a more accurate description.

Finally, there was a chunk of perfectly seared cod, with firm, juicy flesh and tasty, crispy skin. This rests in a humongous bowl amid a thick puree that tasted like green peas.

The bowl probably cost more than what I spend on food in a week.

Finally, our shared dessert arrived – a breathtaking geometric sculpture constructed from about a dozen different kinds of chocolate and chocolate mousse. There was chilli in some of the chocolate pieces, and a refreshing orange sorbet plus sour berries to cut the richness and sweetness.

Sharp, precise, beautiful and a little intimidating as well. We almost didn’t want to eat it.

We were stuffed but the meal didn’t end there. There were freebies galore.

The first was a complimentary dessert: little sweet cakes that were soft but chewy.

We wondered if they’d let us take the tin, but we decided not to risk it.

Next, another free dessert: four cubes of chocolates made by the kitchen. They all had different flavours, and we were told to guess what they were. We thought they tasted remarkably similar. One of them probably had some chamomile tea in it but we weren’t sure.

We failed this taste test rather miserably.

And last, breakfast! Yes, they packed us one complimentary croissant each for breakfast the next day.

Complete with reheating instructions, too.

What a meal! The food was good, obviously. The service, great, if a little over-attentive (we were asked about 5-6 times how everything was – is the chef that insecure about his cooking?). The view, breathtaking. The bill, even more so: a whopping RM711, and no, we’re not missing any decimals.

Was it worth the price? Based on the food alone, probably not. But I guess we have to factor in the swarms of service staff they have, the L’Occitane toiletries in the bathroom and especially the telepath waiting outside the bathroom door for Lady Fartsalot to come out, who knew to open the door just as she was reaching for the handle.

Overall, this meal was perhaps a little too atas for me – I certainly felt out of my depth trying to describe some of the stuff we ate. But what did make this experience truly special for me was being there with the love of my life, who thought I deserved all this lavishness and more.

Bite-sized review

Super-atas Italian place at KLCC – with an amazing view and very high-end food, service and prices. No walk-ins – reservation only, and a strict dress code… so they’re kinda snooty as well.

Stats

Price: Very high. RM711 for a meal for two.

Hours:

Restaurant – Mondays to Thursdays, 7:00pm-11:00pm | Fridays to Sundays, 6:30pm to 12:00am

Bar – 7 days a week, 5:00pm till late

Lounge – Mondays to Saturdays, 3:00pm till late

Dress code: Strictly smart

Reservations: Required for the restaurant, no walk-ins (they recommend to reserve 2 weeks in advance for Fridays to Saturdays, and 1 week in advance for other days) – walk-ins possible for Bar and Lounge